I bought this shirt when I was fat. It was too small for me, but I couldn’t put it back on the rack. At the time I was toying around with the Paleo diet, and thought I’d be able to wear it in a few short months. I didn’t stick with the diet at the time, so the shirt remained in a box in my storage locker.

My in-suite washing machine had been broken for a few weeks, and I was running out of clean tees.1 I hadn’t thought about it in almost a year, but as I pulled the green article out of the box my eyes widened with excitement.

I might be small enough to fit into this thing.

I put it on, and immediately felt the warmth of self confidence emanating from my chest.

Jaugernaut Joe's 40th Jubilee
My moobs are shrinking!

It’s the moustache that does it for me.


Episode 30 of my podcast, Hundred Down, is up. I drop a big announcement a few minutes in, about which I’ll have more to say here in the next a week or so.

  1. White. Whine.